I may be new to UBA, but I am nowhere new to bowling, yes I am an old head. First and foremost I am mentally tough so "miss me with the intimidation" it doesn't work your either going to Lose or Beat me, But like Grandma said in the Klumps "I Aint No Easy Win Ni****a!!!" I do this for fun and you can't bait me into giving away cash. But if you want to fund Strictly Business and our many ventures we will accept your monetary offers..
Since I am an educator please write this down you will be tested on it later after you lose... Lets Begin.....
UBA Squad: Strictly Business... You may now make up your jokes, this is why your reading.
My UBA Name: "Let You Tell It" speaks for itself. You may hear me called Big Dawg, if you can't figure that out stop drinking cheap booze that cost $1 per fifth. If we bowl and you lose, as my name says, "You" explain the reason you lost, I could care less what your excuse is going to be on why you have less pins then me. If you win, I'll shake your hand and still care less. But you'll have my respect for 13.45 minutes maybe 20 if the Pepsi is on you. After that I could still care less
I hope your taking notes there will be a test after bowling.
Video tapping: I have a real life where parents pay attention to what I do when I am on camera please don't act like we are in the bar 27 pints in.. Its all I ask. Remember nothing is lost on the net.. Thank You for respecting my wishes.. Moving on!!
Bowling Style: Old School. 25-15, 20-10, maybe when I really feel like bowling 15-5 and get my Walter Ray on!! (Pause) I don't cover a thousand boards with 20mile a hour of revs. I am writer and do a lot of typing, my wrists are important too me (Pause!! Yea you thought about saying something) Man please who wants to throw the ball like a damn baseball! To sum up my style I am like a good mini van, looks OK, effective for what it is, But chicks aren't going to think it's hot,, but on a cold day they'll rock with you. I'll make 195-249 look real good!!
Thoughts on Bowling period: Its not that serious, I have been around this sport since 1980 and have seen real pro's and cats who love to sit in the bowling alley and talk about the cats they see each week and gamble with. Not impressed. If I haven't seen you under the lights on ESPN you can be got!! Hell, I got Parker Bone in a Pro Am years ago.. (Pause) Yea he was going hard too. (Pause) 269 to 255.. What!! Did it make me any money nope so as I said "Its not that serious" but some of you name dropers like stuff like that so I figured I play to the crowd.. Are you still paying attention. Your notes better be up to par,, I am going to check when I see you on the lanes.. For the record and in all seriousness, I educate children for a living, write books, publish other folks book and speak in public around the country. When I tell you I can't make a UBA event I am far from scared, I am out making a difference. If its that serious I'll come to your house and give you a shot at beating me. (Pause since that seems to effect the way some of you think) The few dollars I win or lose means nothing since I don't feed my family or my business from bowling. Don't get that excited as I said its not that serious. But if you let a cat like me beat you and you live in a bowling alley you suck and you should jump off a bridge.. The Verrazano will do the job!! Watch Saturday Night Fever if you don't believe me.. What You've never seen it!! Damn Youngin!! Tony was man and Bayridge got shine.. I degress please forgive me.. I had a Bee Gee's song stuck in head.
Finally, Please take note,,,,,
My Mantra >>>>>>>> A mantra is a sound, syllable, word, or group of words that are considered capable of "creating transformation" Told you I was an educator, write that down also, I am sure it will be on the test after a loss. Plus you know you didn't know what word meant.. LOL
The all year Mantra (there's that word again) will be as follows.
1. My UBA name is "Let You Tell It" don't get offended when I don't indulge your fantasies of beating me.
2. I'm like the L.A. Clippers, I am not supposed to win, I have as much talent as any Cat in the league, PLEASE don't let me be ahead in the 9th frame.
4. Put Your Powder away.. I am not getting slap and filmed for missing a damn 5 pin!! OK so I won't fall in line.. Do I strike you as a Cat who does! Hope your still taking notes.
3. I have BILLS, YOUR NOT GETTING MY SHIRT or MY GRANTS & BENJAMINS! if you don't know what those are, you have been broke for too long and bowling might not be for you since you are obviously not making enough money in your life.. OH WELL!!!
Thank you for taking the time out to learn who Big Dawg is..
Not for a moment of reality, my websites are www.BravinPublishing.com and www.KLthewriter.com and I am really a 14 year educator and I am trying to change the world. If you would like one of the books I have written please let me know, UBA bowlers get a discount on any purchase and if you want to write a book you'll get a discount on our services. If you're having problems with your child's education don't wait until their failing to ask me some questions on what can be done to save their grade and self-respect. Also if you want a professional plan written up, you'll get a discount on that for being a UBA bowler. Now lets have fun and see where we all can take this UBA thing.. God Bless.
K. L. Belvin aka Big Dawg aka "Let You Tell It"
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